Today’s Totally Random Lines

 

I am known to be a humorous patrician, and one that loves a cup of hot wine with not a drop of allaying Tiber in’t; said to be something imperfect in favouring the first complaint; hasty and tinder-like upon too trivial motion; one that converses more with the buttock of the night than with the forehead of the morning: what I think I utter and spend my malice in my breath. Meeting two such wealsmen (statesmen), as you are, - I cannot call you Lycurguses (a legendary Greek lawmaker), - if the drink you give me touch my palate adversely, I make a crooked face for it. I cannot say you worships have deliver’d the matter well, when I find the ass in compound with the major part of your syllables: and though I must be content to bear with those that say you are reverend grave men, yet they lie deadly that tell you you have good faces.  

 

Menenius Agrippa

Coriolanus                 Act II, Scene i, Line 50

 

Where to start? Well, first off, I came to the end of a sentence with I make a crooked face for it, but I couldn’t help myself. I had to continue to include the part about the ass and the syllables. That’s right, Shakespeare is having Menenius tell these guys that they’re talking out of their asses. I felt compelled to include that.

This is a scene where Menenius Agrippa, the wise old advisor and friend to Coriolanus, comes upon two of the representatives of the people. These two are real weasels who have it out for Coriolanus, and Menenius knows it. In Today’s Lines he is talking first about himself and then about the two of them and telling them what weasels they are. Unfortunately for me, the word wealsmen has nothing to do with weasles, it’s just an old term for statesmen. Oh well.

I’m finding it very difficult today to stay at 30,000 feet. Every time I see these two wealsmen in Coriolanus, I cannot help but think of all of today’s current wealsmen (better termed weaselmen and weaselwomen), and their Weasel-in-Chief. Sorry, can’t help myself. I considered going into an epic rant, but I’ll spare you, and in the meantime limit my rants to the buttock of the night.

It just occurred to me that Will made reference to the rear end of human anatomy twice today. Menenius talks about conversing more with the buttock of the night than with the forehead of the morning, and later speaks about the ass in compound with the major part of your syllables to the two wealsmen.

Will is the best; so good that he helps me to pull back up to 30,000 feet.  Most of the time.

Something else that helps to keep us both at 30,000 feet: bird watching. 

 

Today’s Totally Random Lines

 

Ah, thou, the model where old Troy did stand,

Thou map of honour, thou King Richard’s tomb.

And not King Richard; thou most beauteous inn,

Why should hard-favour’d grief be lodged in thee,

When triumph is become an alehouse guest.

 

Queen

King Richard the Second                      Act V, Scene i, Line 14

 

This is King Richard’s queen talking, but this is the end of the play and Richard has been deposed by Bolingbroke at this point. The queen is waiting outside the Tower of London to watch Richard go by on his way to imprisonment there.

I believe that thou, in both sentences above, refers to the Tower, and when she says not King Richard she is referencing the fact that Richard’s no longer the king.

So, whilst the five lines can be understood fairly easily, at least on the surface, they’re pretty loaded nonetheless. Should we unload them?

NO!

 Well, I guess the king has spoken.

 

Today’s Totally Random Lines

 

Ay, springes to catch woodcocks. I do know,

When the blood burns, how prodigal the soul

Lends the tongue vows: these blazes, daughter,

Giving more light than heat - extinct in both,

Even in their promise, as it is a-making, -

You must not take for fire.

Polonius

Hamlet                           Act I, Scene iii, Line 117

 

It’s amazing that I taught this play to a high school class and I can still go back to it and not recall having read so very much of it. I guess, to be fair, that class was over twenty years ago, so…

Anyway, this is a scene with brother, sister, and father. Brother Laertes has already left the scene, on his way to France, but not before telling his sister Ophelia to stay away from Hamlet. He gave her a good talking to about how Hamlet was no good for her. Now father Polonius is talking to daughter Ophelia and telling her pretty much the same thing. Today’s lines are the beginning of Polonius’s lecture to his daughter, in response to her lines

My lord, he hat importuned me with love

In honourable fashion…

…And hath given countenance to his speech, my lord,

With almost all the holy vows of heaven.

Polonius is referring to Hamlet’s holy vows of heaven as springes to catch woodcocks.

In any event, after telling her in his very wordy way, to stay away from Hamlet, Ophelia ends the scene with the words,

I shall obey, my lord.

So that’s the end of that. Well, not really.

But that springes to catch woodcocks reminds me of something. What was it?

Oh yeah, I gotta put out mouse traps!

  

 There goes another one, Mr. Blagys!

 

Today’s Totally Random Lines

 

Give me thy torch, boy; hence, and stand aloof:-

Yet put it out, for I would not be seen.

 

Paris

Romeo and Juliet            Act V, Scene iii, Line 1

 

These are the first lines of the last scene of the play. A lot is going to happen in the three hundred lines of this scene. Paris will die, Romeo will die, and Juliet will die. So then, as Paris speaks these lines all of these three are still alive, and, if you think about it, as this scene starts, the play could still have a fairly happy ending. Interesting. 

 

 

Wait, does it? Does this play have a happy ending? I thought it was a tragedy?

Well, I woke sleepy head up with that one.

No Mojeo, sadly it does not.

I always call him Mojeo when we’re doing Romeo and Juliet. That was his idea.

 

Today’s Totally Random Lines

 

Nay, that’s certain.

Cleopatra

Antony and Cleopatra             Act V, Scene ii, Line 221

 

So, are we interested in what’s certain? Are we? Well, I’m a little interested, so I guess I’ll take a look.

It turns out that Cleopatra is talking to Iras about what will happen to them if Caesar takes them prisoner.

Nay, ‘tis most certain, Iras: saucy lictors (Roman officers)

Will catch at us, like strumpets; and scald rimers (contemptible balladeers)

Ballad us our o’tune: the quick comedians

Extemporally (without any preparation) will stage us, and present

Our Alexandrian revels; Antony

Shall be brought drunken forth, and I shall see

Some squeaking Cleopatra boy my greatness

I’the posture of a whore.

It doesn’t sound all that appealing, does it?

By the way, I got those definitions that I added in parentheses on a modern search engine. They’re not from some ancient language!

Shakespeare translation indeed!

 This Shakespeare nut I’ve got here is always getting his knickers in a twist.

He needs to just CALM DOWN.

 

 

Today’s Totally Random Lines

 

The poor, lame, blind, halt, creep, cry out for thee;

But they ne’er meet with Opportunity.

 

Lucrece

Lucrece                                 Line 902

 

Lucrece is lying in her bed. She has been raped by Tarquin, he has fled, and now she is having all sorts of thoughts: none of them particularly good.

In this particular stanza, and several that go before it, she is blaming Opportunity for what happened to her. That’s right, she’s personifying Opportunity (hence the capital O). She’s spent the previous four stanzas talking about all the troubles that different people get themselves into, and how it wouldn’t have happened if they’d not had the Opportunity. Now, in these last two lines that we have today, she’s noting that the people who could use Opportunity to help them out of troubles never see Opportunity.

Interesting.

Opportunity. Today’s line is all about Opportunity and the lack thereof. But it puts a really bad spin on Opportunity. I think generally we use Opportunity in a more positive sense.

For instance: 

We recently had the Opportunity to take a fantastic trip (see previous post).

And Mojo had the Opportunity to make a new friend. Yes, he has a somewhat apprehensive look on his face, but I can assure you that Mojo and Dave got along famously. 

Opportunity. 

 

Today’s Totally Random Lines

 

I can live no longer by thinking.

 

Orlando

As You Like It        Act V, Scene ii, Line 52

Well how about that for a restart line! I think I feel this way after a week in Malta having the best time of my life. It feels a little bit like I should just enjoy life and stop doing so much thinking! I think (dare I use that expression) that Orlando’s got it right!

This is the crew, our crew, that traveled all the way to Malta to celebrate our 25 year vow renewals with us. 

A dream come true! 

No more thinking needed.

No, Mojo couldn't make this trip with us, but he's happy to have us back home.

 

Today’s Totally Random Line

 

If ever I live to see it, I will challenge it.

 

King Henry

King Henry the Fifth                     Act IV, Scene i, Line 220

 

This is the scene that takes place the night before the Battle of Agincourt. King Henry is wandering about the camp disguised as a common soldier talking with the troops.

Todays’ Line is spoken to a soldier named Michael Williams. The King and Michael have gotten into an argument because the latter is disputing that the King would be willing to die with them in battle. Michael has said that the King has only said he would to make us fight cheerfully: but when our throats are cut, he may be ransom’d, and we ne’er the wiser.

By ransom’d he means that the French will take Henry captive and sell him back to British. It's what them did back then with all the high ranking soldiers. The commoners got killed in battle, whilst the officers got taken captive to be ransom’d.

That’s right, the one percenters lived and the ninety-nine percenters died. Sound familiar?

I'm not sure I like where this is going. It might be time to PULL UP!

 

 

Today’s Totally Random Line

 

‘Art thou ashamed to kiss? Then wink again,

And I will wink; so shall the day seem night;

Love keeps his revels where there are but twain;

Be bold to play, our sport is not in sight:

These blue-vein’d violets whereon we lean

Never can blab, nor know not what we mean.

 

Venus

Venus and Adonis                         Line 121

This is one verse from the poem. It’s the second page of an eleven-page poem, and Venus is trying to get some action from Adonis; trying and failing. She’s telling him that no one’s going to see them, and that the violets that they’re sitting on aren’t going to blab.

Can you believe it: Blab is a Shakespearean word? Blab? Who would’ve thunk it?  

Blab?

Yes, Mojo: Blab.

 

Today’s Totally Random Line

 

Sir, his wife, some two months since, fled from his house; her pretence is a pilgrimage to Saint Jaques le Grand; which holy undertaking, with most austere sanctimony, she accomplist; and there residing, the tenderness of her nature became as a prey to her grief; in fine, made a groan of her last breath; and now she sings in heaven.

 

First Lord

All’s Well That Ends Well             Act IV, Scene iii, Line 46

 

The first and second lord, two anonymous henchmen here, are bringing us up to date on what’s going on with the two main people of the play. Betram is working on getting into bed with some local babe (this was related earlier in the scene), whilst his wife Helena, having given up on her marriage, went on a pilgrimage and subsequently died of grief. Spoiler alert: she’s not really dead.

So, what can we say about Today’s Line? Should we talk about Will’s use of anonymous henchmen to relate off-stage happenings to keep the play flowing? He does this a lot in some of his plays. Should we spend some time with his language: became a prey to her grief. Perhaps we can discuss Will’s propensity for really long sentences: seven plus lines full of commas, and semicolons. Or is there something else. Or perhaps we don’t discuss the line at all? Thoughts?

How about turning up the damn heat, how's that for a thought, huh? 

Holey moley, I'm freezing my baguettes off here! 

 

Today’s Totally Random Lines

 

And strange it is

That nature must compel us to lament

Our most persisted deeds.

 

Agrippa                                                               

Antony and Cleopatra                   Act V, Scene i, Line 28

 

In today’s context Agrippa is talking about the fact that they are all sad to hear that Antony has killed himself, even though he is the enemy and they are in Egypt to find Antony and defeat him. 

But, as with much of Will’s great lines, we can use this line to apply to a myriad of things in our own lives. I guess you can use this phrase to talk about bad habits; things you might do constantly even though you wish you didn’t do them. Actually, that would be a perfect use of it.

 

“I wish I weren’t such a push over. Every time someone asks me for something I say yes.”

“And strange it is that nature must compel us to lament our most persisted deeds.”

“Huh?”

 

Yeah, that would probably be the response in most cases: huh?

I don't foresee a lot of lamentation being a result of this persistent deed. Do you?

 

Today’s Totally Random Lines

 

Did your letters pierce the queen to any demonstration of grief?

 

Earl of Kent                                                        

King Lear                      Act IV, Scene iii, Line 10

 

Kent is speaking to a messenger who had brought the former’s letter to Cordelia describing what has happened to Lear, her father, and how her sisters have mistreated him. Remember, after Lear rejected Cordelia she went and married the king of France. So, I guess that makes her a queen.

The messenger’s response, indeed this whole very short scene, is worth reading. Well, it’s Shakespeare; so what else is new. Anyway, here’s the first part of the messenger’s response to Kent. 

Ay, sir; she took them, read them in my presence;

And now and then an ample tear trill’d down

Her delicate cheek: it seem’d she was a queen

Over her passion; who, most rebel-like,

Sought to be king o’er her.

The tear was ample, it trill’d, and her cheek was delicate.

I wish I could write like that.

Your writing's pretty good, Mr. Blagys. 

Of course, it's not Shakespeare; but whose is?

Thanks Mojo.

 

Today’s Totally Random Lines

 

Fear it not, sir: I would I were so sure

To win the king, as I am bold her honour

Will remain hers.

 

Posthumus Leonatus

Cymbeline                      Act II, Scene iv, Line 1

 

Posthumus is saying that he’s sure that his wife will be faithful to him. He’s right, but rat-fink Iachimo is going to show up in a minute and convince him otherwise.

I have to say, Will certainly uses infidelity, whether real or assumed, as a major part of the plot of so many of his plays! Off the top of my head, Othello, The Winter’s Tale, Much Ado About Nothing… well that’s all I can come up with right now. I bet, though, that if I went through the list of his plays I’d come up with a few more.

Well, if you think about it, jealousy is one of the strongest of human emotions. Interesting to think about, isn’t it? It should be love, or maybe grief, but I’m not so sure. Jealousy is very strong. I guess Will knew that. Yes sir, I would love to sit down to a dinner with this guy.

When, oh  when, is this guy going to realize that William Shakespeare died four hundred years ago, and dead people don't come to dinner. When?

 

Today’s Totally Random Lines

 

She is young and apt:

Our own precedent passions do instruct us

What levity’s in youth.

 

Old Athenian

Timon of Athens                    Act I, Scene i, Line 136

 

I find this line easily understandable. Is that because I read a lot of Shakespeare, or is it indeed easily understandable? Either way, it’s a nice line.

Just to add some context: the Old Athenian is at Timon’s house. It so happens that one of Timon’s servants is in love with the Old Athenian’s daughter and the old man is trying to get Timon to forbid his servant from seeing the girl. Timon asks if the girl is in love with his servant, and this is the Old Athenian’s response: she’s young, and our own experience of being young tells us how irresponsible and impulsive young people are. Our own precedent passions. Such a nice phrase, precedent passions.

See, that’s what Will is all about: putting words like that together. It’s so simple, and yet, two words that say so much. Precedent passions describe the feelings we experienced when we were young that we now no longer feel, and yet still remember.

Will struck this very same note in The Tempest when Prospero was watching his daughter Miranda interacting and falling in love with Ferdinand. Prospero said,

So glad of this as they I cannot be,

Who are surprised withal; but my rejoicing

At nothing can be more.

Prospero’s saying that he can’t feel the emotions the young’ns are feeling, but he’s still happy.

So glad of this as they I cannot be is nowhere near as lovely as precedent passions, but it gets the point across.

It’s interesting to note that both Timon and Tempest were written towards the tail end of Will’s career when he himself was getting older and feeling much more like the Old Athenian, or Prospero than like a young lover.

I could go on here, about my own personal experience and the difference between youthful bliss that can only be experienced and felt by the young, and the different kind of love and happiness that comes with an older age. But I won’t.

Anyway, I really like precedent passions.

So, how can this picture possibly be relevant? Well, I'll tell you how. It's tree climbing.

Yes, tree climbing is a boy's activity, and one that an older fellow can look back on and only try to remember the joy of being up so high and looking down on everything; a joy an older guy like me can no longer experience.

Or can he?

Granted, tree climbing does not involve the same degree of passion as the precedent passion talked about in Today's Line, but I think the relevance is valid nonetheless. 

And just in case you're wondering 'Where's Mojo?', well, he's in that fenced in area below the Prius - the light brown area with the raised beds. I guess you can't actually see him, but he's there. You can't see Patrice or Walker yelling  'Get out of that tree before you fall and break your neck, you old fool!', but they're there too. 

Ahhh, tree climbing.

 

Today’s Totally Random Lines

 

Peace, good pint-pot; peace, good tickle-brain.

 

Sir John Falstaff

King Henry the Fourth Part I       Act II, Scene iv, Line 407

 

Falstaff is telling the hostess to be quiet, as he is about to launch into yet one more of his lengthy, bombastic speeches. Whilst I can’t say that I’m familiar with these terms, pint-pot and tickle-brain, based on the context they appear to be mildly negative epithets; particularly when prefaced with good. Think of them as being sort of like Archie’s reference to Edith as a dingbat, if you’re old enough to know what I’m talking about.  

I called him a pint-pot and now he's sulking. 

I guess you've gotta be careful how you use this stuff.

 

Today’s Totally Random Lines

 

To Eltham will I, where the young king is,

Being ordain’d his special governor;

And for his safety there I’ll best devise.

 

Duke of Exeter

King Henry the Sixth Part I          Act I, Scene i, Line 170

 

This first scene of King Henry VI Part I is set at the funeral of Henry V. However, Will wrote this play before he wrote Henry V. He wrote plays about all the kings from Edward III, who reigned in the middle of the 1300’s, covering everyone up to Henry VIII, who died in 1547. Will’s writing career began in the 1580’s, just to give you some context. Elizabeth, Henry VIII’s daughter, was queen then. 

Not all the kings of this two hundred year period have their own play; some are covered in the other plays. Edward IV, for instance is covered in Henry the Sixth Part III and also in Richard the Third. You can read the plays in order, which kind of makes sense, but Will didn’t write them in order; he wrote today’s play first. In fact, today’s play, Henry the Sixth Part I, is one of the first plays that Will wrote in his career. We’re not really sure exactly what order he wrote all his plays in, but this one is one of the first. This one, The Comedy of Errors, and a few others are the ones considered to be his first written plays. Most of this conjecture is based on dates of performances that we still have.

So there’s a little Shakespeare history for you. I had to look up Edward’s and Henry VIII’s dates. I was never great at dates. But, as noted, Will covered about two hundred years of British history in his history plays. And, of course, that was a pretty turbulent time as it included the Wars of the Roses which took up a large part of the 1400’s.

What else would you like to know about? Modern U.S. pop culture? Ehhh, not so well versed on that. I’ll let my associates handle those questions.

And here are the aforementioned associates now; no doubt doing some of that modern U.S. pop culture research. 

CrakerJack researchers they are, both of them. 

 

Today’s Totally Random Lines

 

Think you not on him till to-morrow: I’ll devise thee brave punishment for him – Strike up, pipers!

[Dance. Exeunt.]

 

Benedick

Much Ado About Nothing             Act V, Scene iv, Line 128

 

It’s the last line of the play. Benedick is reacting to the messenger who’s said that they’ve caught the former’s brother, John, and they’re bringing him back to Messina. John is the villain of the play and without him there wouldn’t have been Much Ado, the play would have been mostly About Nothing. So, I guess they should have been talking about rewarding John instead of punishing him. Right?

Wait, what?

 

Today’s Totally Random Lines

 

Counsel, Lucetta; gentle girl, assist me;

And, even in kind love, I do conjure thee,--

Who art the table wherein all my thoughts

Are visibly character’d and engraved,--

To lesson me; and tell me some good mean,

How, with my honour, I may undertake

A journey to my loving Proteus.

 

Julia

The Two Gentlemen of Verona     Act II, Scene vii, Line 1

 

I think we should look at this in detail so we can understand the lines and realize just how easy it is to read Shakespeare. I say that because I’ve been getting a lot of feedback lately on just how difficult it is, and with this I disagree.

First off, counsel is being used as a verb: Counsel me, Lucetta. Give me some advice. Julia continues, in the first two lines, to ask, to beg, Lucetta to help her. Lines three and four are a separate thought in the middle of these lines, set off by the dashes, and referring to Lucetta. These two lines are a lovely metaphor for how close these two women are, but they are not part of the main thought of the lines.

We get back to that main part of the thought after the second set of dashes. So, she’s begged, Lucetta to help her in the first two lines, explained why Lucetta is the one who can best help her in the next two lines, and now she’ll say what she wants help with. So, go ahead, read the last three lines again, and you tell me what Julia wants help with. That’s right, I’m not going to tell you. Go ahead, re-read the last three lines of Today’s Lines.

In the meantime, I’m going back to the metaphor of lines three and four, because I think that’s the best part of Today's Lines. I think that this is a very sweet thing to say to someone:

You,

Who art the table wherein all my thoughts

Are visibly character’d and engraved.

Goodness, that belongs in a love sonnet. I wonder if Lucetta got the compliment. To be clear, Lucetta is a servant, a waiting woman, to Julia. None the less, Shakespeare’s works are full of relationships between servants and their superiors, many of them very close relationships. Apparently Lucetta either didn't get the compliment or decides to pass over it because her response is short and simple.

Alas, the way is wearisome and long.

She cuts to the chase. Clearly, Lucetta read Strunk and White and adheres to the no unnecessary words credo (as just as clearly Julia does not).

But think about it: You are the table, the whiteboard, where all my thoughts are easily read. That is a description of a person who’s very close to you; a person who knows you perhaps better than you know yourself. It’s a very nice thing to say to someone, and it just gets passed over here.

I think there’s a whole lot of stuff in Shakespeare, that’s really, really good stuff, that gets overlooked. Perhaps that’s a metaphor for life, eh?

A metaphor for life, ugghh.

You're a metaphor for life.

 

Today’s Totally Random Lines

 

If thou, that bidd’st me be content, wert grim,

Ugly, and slanderous to thy mother’s womb,

Full of unpleasing blots and sightless stains,

Lame, foolish, crooked, swart, prodigious,

Pacht with foul moles and eye-offending marks

I would not care, I then would be content;

For then I should not love thee; no, nor thou

Become thy great birth, nor deserve a crown.

But thou art fair; and at thy birth, dear boy,

Nature and Fortune join’d to make thee great;

Of Nature’s gifts thou mayst with lilies boast

And with the half-blown rose: but Fortune, O!

She is corrupted changed and won from thee;

Sh’adulterates hourly with thine Uncle John;

And with her golden hand hath pluckt on France

To tread down fair respect of sovereignty,

And made his majesty the bawd to theirs.

 

Constance

King John       Act III, Scene i, Line 48

 

Okay, that's a long one. No sense complaining; let's just get at it.

The line previous to this is Arthur, the son of Constance, saying to his mother,

I do beseech you, madam, be content.

Previous to that, Constance had been on a rant about the horrible peace deal that had been struck with France. It seems that much of the kingdom has been given up and she’s upset because her son, Arthur, who is the heir to the throne of the childless King John, stands to inherit a much lesser kingdom than she thinks he should be getting. That is her issue, and that is what she’s talking about in Today’s Lines.

So what’s she saying to Arthur? She’s saying that if he was born ugly, stupid, and worthless she wouldn’t love him, and he wouldn’t deserve the crown. But he’s not, he’s born to greatness, and nature and fortune dictate greatness for him. However, his worthless Uncle John (again, that’s King John), has corrupted fortune and worked to make sure that the England that Arthur will inherit as ruler will be subservient to France.

And there you have it. Overbearing mother, or a concerned parent with a valid gripe? You tell me.  

Overbearing my butt! This lady is right on. 

I would certainly hope that someone would stick up for me if you were going to screw up all that I'm going to be inheriting from you when you kick the bucket. 

Mojo, you're not going to be inherit....   oh, never mind.