Today’s Totally Random Lines

 

The great Achilles,—whom opinion crowns

The sinew and the forehand of our host,--

Having his ear full of airy fame,

Grows dainty of his worth, and in his tent

Lies mocking our designs: with him, Patroclus,

Upon a lazy bed, the livelong day

Breaks scurril jests;

And with ridiculous and awkward action-- 

Which, slanderer, he imitation calls--

He pageants us.

Ulysses

Troilus and Cressida                     Act I Scene iii, Line 143

And there you have it. The Greek leaders are discussing why they aren’t winning this war. In today’s passage Ulysses is saying that one reason for this is that their best fighter,— their sinew and forehand — Achilles, is dogging it: laying around all day in bed with his boy-toy Patroclus, whilst the latter talks smack about the Greek leaders. 

Yes, that is exactly what Ulysses is saying. So, was Achilles gay? Ask Patroclus.

Wait, Achilles was gay? I'll be darned.

 

Today’s Totally Random Lines

 

No? What needed, then, that terrible dispatch of it into your pocket? The quality of nothing hath not such need to hide itself. Let’s see: come, if it be nothing, I shall not need my spectacles.

 

Earl of Gloster

King Lear                      Act I Scene ii, Line 33

The Earl is talking to his son, Edmund, about the letter that Edmund is holding and not letting his father see.

Yesterday we were looking at meter, and the question came up concerning the use of meter and prose in Will’s works. Yes, whilst much of his plays are written in the infamous iambic pentameter, there is much that is written in plain old prose, like Today’s Lines and like what you’re reading right now. And, in fact, this scene is a perfect example. It begins with Edmund alone, talking about his illegitimacy and how he’s going to get the upper hand on his half- brother by forging a letter that he will make sure his father will find. All this is in verse (iambic pentameter). Gloster enters, also speaking in verse, until he sees the letter that Edmund is trying to “hide” from him. As soon as the topic goes to the letter, the text leaves verse and goes to prose. And it remains prose for the rest of the scene until Edmund is alone again at the end where it goes back to verse for the last six lines of the scene.

Why does Will flip back and forth twixt verse and prose? I can make all sorts of speculations, but the fact of the matter is, wait for it…

I don’t…………………………knooowwwww.

And I’m not sure anyone really does. 

 

Acckk! I knew he was gonna say that. 

I just…knew!

 

Today’s Totally Random Lines

 

To gratify the good Andronicus,

And gratulate his safe return to Rome,

The people will accept whom he admits.

 

Tribunes

Titus Andronicus          Act I Scene i, Line 275

I think the tribunes (senators) are telling Titus that he can decide who’s going to be the emperor. It looks like Titus can have the job if he wants it, but I don’t think he does. In any event, he nominates Saturninus who readily accepts it.

Yes, you’re right, it’s an opening to relate this somehow to current politics and world leaders, but I’m not going to do that.

So, we’ve got some nice iambic pentameter going on this morning. Do you ever read the lines just to appreciate the meter? I do. 

I know: quirky.

In fact, I was told this past weekend that I come from a whole family of quirky people. We’re all quirky. Hmm, I guess that’s not a bad word. Is it?

Quirky? Quirky?

 

Today’s Totally Random Lines

 

I did very well note him.

 

Horatio

Hamlet                    Act III, Scene ii, Line 301

This is Horatio speaking to Hamlet after the former asked him if he saw how Claudius reacted violently to the staging of the play within the play.

Horatio is an interesting character. He’s in the first scene of the play with the men on the ramparts when they see the ghost of King Hamlet. He’s also in the last scene, the second to the last person to speak at the end of the play, when Hamlet (and half of the cast) lie dead.  He’s in the famous line Alas, poor Yorick! I knew him, Horatio. In fact, he’s at a lot of pivotal points in the play, and I think he is the only one that Hamlet speaks his true mind to. He is the one person that Hamlet considers a real friend. 

I imagine there have been volumes written about Horatio and his relationship with Hamlet. I’ve not read any of those volumes. In spite of this, I feel safe in saying of Horatio that I did very well note him. Wouldn’t you agree?

I do very well note, Sir, that you are getting a comfy seat on the couch whilst I am stuck down here on the floor.

Noted.

 Today’s Totally Random Lines

 

Come, you are a tedious fool: to the purpose.

Escalus

Measure For Measure     Act II, Scene i, Line 119

I’m taking this line of the day to be directed at myself. I’ve been more anxious lately, I think in large part to national and world events, but I’m letting it affect my daily life. I find myself having a hard time getting things done. Of course, the answer is to just start getting things done. Work in my circle of concern: exercise more, move and be physically active more. 

And then I read this line.

Come, you are a tedious fool: to the purpose.

Yes, of course; I am a tedious fool. I haven’t even done the daily lines for a few days. In truth, the reason for that was twofold: one is the aforementioned struggling and letting the state of the world get to me, and two is that the random lines picked the last two days have been pretty meh. But enough!

Come, you are a tedious fool; to the purpose.
Get over it, buddy!

Of course, this can be a good line for all sorts of occasions, like those times when long-story-short-Tony is just going on and on, and all you want is for him to get to the point?

Come, you are a tedious fool: to the purpose!

But for today, I think it is best directed to myself:

Come, you are a tedious fool! To the purpose!

 

Come, you are a tedious fool: to the purpose!

Whoa! Mojo, easy there, buddy. It's a good line, but not necessarily one you want to use on someone five times your size.

 

Today’s Totally Random Lines

 

There’s but one down; the son is fled.

 

Third Murderer

Macbeth                          Act III, Scene iii, Line 19

Since we covered this short scene not very long ago, I’ve decided to offer something completely different for your consideration this morning.

I chanced upon this sonnet, written in true Shakespearean Sonnet form, whilst surfing today. Yes, every once in a while it is actually possible to come up with something worthwhile whilst surfing the internet; not that I recommend it.

This sonnet is a poem by Robert Frost. It’s absolutely lovely. He just loves to write about trees, doesn’t he?


Into My Own

One of my wishes is that those dark trees,
So old and firm they scarcely show the breeze,
Were not, as ‘twere, the merest mask of gloom,
But stretched away unto the edge of doom.
I should not be withheld but that some day
Into their vastness I should steal away,
Fearless of ever finding open land,
Or highway where the slow wheel pours the sand.
I do not see why I should e’re turn back,
Or those should not set forth upon my track
To overtake me, who should miss me here
And long to know if still I held them dear.
       They would not find me changed from him they knew—
       Only more sure of all I thought was true.


Oh, that is fabulous. You might have to read it more than once before it sinks in. I can see why my Gram said Frost was her favorite poet.

Even my wide-eyed little friend got excited about that poem. 

I guess we all need a break from Shakespeare once in a while.

 Today’s Totally Random Lines

 

This is the brief (summary, or short account)of money, plate, and jewels,

I am possest of: ‘tis exactly valued;

Not petty things omitted. – Where’s Seleucus?

 

Cleopatra

Antony and Cleopatra                    Act V, Scene ii, Line 140

Cleopatra is speaking to Octavius, and it’s near the end of the play. Antony has already killed himself. Cleopatra is offering Ocatavius, the conquering Roman, a list of all the treasures that he is entitled to.

Seleucus, by the way is the accountant. It’s nice to see accountants figure in to Shakespeare’s works once in a while, isn’t it. Yes, officially he’s listed as Treasurer, but that’s just an accountant who’s gotten a few promotions.

Anyway, she’s looking for Seleucus because she wants him to validate the summary of the treasures that she just gave to Octavius. Seleucus, being a good and honest accountant, shows up and contradicts Cleopatra, saying that she held some stuff back from the summary. How about that? It takes the accountant to have enough balls to contradict the boss. Cleopatra asks Seleucus what she’s held back, and he answers,

Enough to purchase what you have made known.

So I guess that means she’s held back as much as she’s reported on the summary. But Octavius isn’t upset. He knows that Cleopatra is just being smart. It’s all a pretty moot point anyway because she’s going to kill herself before the scene is over, and hey, you can’t take it with you.

So what’s the moral of the story today? I think the moral is trust the accountant. But make sure it’s a real accountant, not just some hedge fund manager. They’re not accountants; I’m not sure what they are. Take the current Secretary of the Treasury, Scott Bessent. He’s got a polo-sci degree, he made his millions managing hedge funds, and he contributed millions to Orange Guy’s campaign. Unfortunately, I’m pretty sure that Bessent is no Seleucus. No, not at all. What a shame.

 

Okay, got it: accountants - good, 

hedge fund managers - bad. 

Now will you throw my leopard for me? can we play catch? Huh, can we? Can we?

 

 

Today’s Totally Random Lines

 

For he the night before, in Tarquin’s tent,

Unlocks the treasure of his happy state;

What priceless wealth the heavens had him lent

In the possession of his beauteous mate;

Reckoning his fortune at so high-proud rate,

That kings might be espoused to more fame,

But king nor peer to such a peerless dame.

 

Narrator

Lucrece                   Line 20

Well, today we have a line from neither a play nor a sonnet. Remember, if you will, that Shakespeare wrote plays, sonnets, and also a handful of long poems. And today we have lines from one of the latter, Lucrece, sometimes titled The Rape of Lucrece because it’s about, well, the rape of Lucrece. Yes, the whole poem, all 1,855 lines are about the lead up, the rape, and the aftermath of the rape. So it’s not one of Will’s most up-beat works.

Today’s lines are from the beginning of the poem, and it has a somewhat odd beginning. The very first lines of the poem (previous to the lines above) are about Tarquin (he’s the rapist) hightailing it from Arda and heading for Collatium in haste because he’s hot in desire. What’s got him all fired up? The previous night Collatine (he’s Lucrece’s husband) telling him (in today’s lines) about his wife back home in Collatium and what a babe she is. So that’s today’s lines, Collatine describing his wife.

Well, that was a bit of a long way around, eh?
The ‘he’ in today’s lines is Collatine. So, do today’s lines make sense now? You should read it again, because I’m sure it will make more sense with my brief intro.

 

Zzzzzzzz

Okay, perhaps not quite as brief as it could have been.

 

Today’s Totally Random Lines

 

Lord, let me never have a cause to sigh,

Till I be brought to such a silly pass!

 

Widow

The Taming of the Shrew      Act V, Scene ii, Line 124

We are at the very end of the play. Katharine, the titular shrew, is displaying actions that would certainly indicate that she has been tamed. In the line previous to today’s, Petruchio told her that he didn’t like the hat she was wearing.

Off with that bauble, throw it under foot.
                                         
And Katharina quickly takes off the hat and steps on it. That’s what the widow is responding to with Today’s Lines. And rightly so? I’m not so sure. Let's open this up.

Katharina started out unmarried and apparently pretty unhappy. She was not a pleasant person to be around, and she certainly wasn’t nice to anyone. Petruchio decided that she would make a good wife, so Katharina’s father gladly gave her to him.

Petruchio didn’t physically or verbally abuse his wife, but he did let her know that he was in charge, and he did insist that she go along with things the way he wanted. Along the way Katharina realized that this whole thing was going to work out better all around if she just went along with Petruchio, and when she did, things started to work out quite well for her. Along with his crazy demands, Petruchio actually did treat her quite well, and I believe he loved her too.

There’s a lot more to it than I can explain in a few lines. Suffice it so say that this is not just a play about men in charge and women being tamed. Unfortunately, it is also a play that might not get past modern sensibilities, partly because of the title, and partly because it needs to be looked at really hard and long to be fully appreciated.

Anyway, there you have it. If you ever get a chance to see this play, I hope you take advantage of it. And when you do, I hope that you go with a very open mind. Then, if you come away feeling that Will was simply an ardent misogynist, well so be it. But I hope not.

Hey, what's a mistogynistist?

 

Today’s Totally Random Lines

 

Alack, where are you? Speak, an if you hear;

Speak, of all loves! I swoon almost with fear.

No!—then I well perceive you are not nigh:

Either death or you I’ll find immediately.

Hermia

A Midsummer Night’s Dream       Act II, Scene ii, Line 154

Okay then, Midsummer Night’s Dream. I know I’ve always said that I don’t care for this play (even though it’s one of Will’s more popular comedies), and that’s still true. But I will admit that there are parts of it that are starting to grow on me. However, the scenes with the four lovers running around the in the woods is not one of those parts. Yes, this scene is the lovers in the woods.

Maybe it’s just because, in my laziness, I’ve never bothered to learn the four lovers and who’s in love with who and who isn’t in love with who. There’s Hermia, Helena, Lysander, and Demetrius. There, at least I know all the names, but it doesn’t make it any easier to remember who loves who when the ones who aren’t in love with each other suddenly are in love because of the love potion that Puck starts spreading around.

Hermia, here, has just woken up alone, calling for Lysander. Does she love Lysander and, if so, does she really love him or is it a love potion spell love. Or is Lysander Helena’s guy? And what about Demetrius? Where's he? 

I guess I’ll just never have these four figured out. Oh well.

I have to tell you, Mr. Blagys, I know how Hermia feels. Some days I wake up and neither of you guys are here and I call out "Alack, where are you." But you guys don’t answer. It’s like you just completely forget about me. And you know, I can't get out of this bed without breaking a leg or two. 

So, what’ up with that?

 

 

Today’s Totally Random Lines

 

I do dine to-day at the father’s of a certain pupil of mine; where, if, before repast, it shall please you to gratify the table with a grace, I will, on my privilege I have with the parent of the foresaid child or pupil, undertake your benvenuto (welcome) ; where I will prove those verses to be very unlearned, neither savouring of poetry, wit, nor invention: I beseech your society.

 

Holofernes

Love’s Labour’s Lost                     Act IV, Scene ii, Line 163

Did you read that whole thing? Did you? Well that's impressive!

I hope you’re not thinking that I’m going to explain it to you, are you? I have to tell you: I listened to the whole scene (this passage is almost at the end of the scene) whilst I was reading it. I even used my copy of the play with the footnotes. It was only ten minutes, but I’m not sure it was the best ten minutes I’ve spent today. In fact, sitting in my chair with Mojo sleeping on my lap whilst I perused the penguin book was a much better ten minutes (actually a bit longer than ten minutes, but who's counting). Meeting my brother Billy for breakfast in Milford was time well spent, as was stopping at Big Y for some groceries. Almost making an online order for a bottle of Okavango Gin was time well spent (I couldn't bring myself to spend $107 on one bottle of gin; maybe at a later date). Yup, just about anything was time better spent.

With this random line stuff, you get some winners and you get some losers. That’s just the way it is; kind a microcosm of life in general, eh?

 

Hold on, Mr. Blagys, that’s it? Nothing else about today's  line? Just some nonsense about penguins, Billy, and Okavango gin?

What’s going on here?

And what's Okavango gin, anyway? 

 Today’s Totally Random Lines

 

No, sooth, sir: my determinate voyage is mere extravogancy. But I perceive in you so excellent a touch of modesty, that you will not extort from me what I am willing to keep in; therefore it charges me in manners the rather to express myself.

 

Sebastian

Twelfth Night                 Act II, Scene i, Line 15

Antonio asks Sebastian where he’ll be going,
Let me yet know of you whither you are bound, 

and Today’s Lines are Sebastian’s  answer.
Pete’s version: Honestly, I’m not sure where I’m going, and you’re obviously not going to press me for information, so it behooves me to tell you a little bit about myself.

Lines like this, though beautifully written and well worth reading and spending time with, really make me wonder: did they actually talk like this in 1590’s London? My determinate voyage is mere extravagancy? Really? Perhaps I should try this one the next time Patrice asks me where I’m going as I’m heading out the door.

My determinate voyage is mere extravagancy, dear.

I’ll give you some extravagancy, buddy; now tell me, where the hell are you going?

Ahh, it’s just another one of Will’s lines that I wisht I’d be able to remember. But, alas..

Anyway, Sebastian goes on to get into a bit of his life story for Antonio (and the audience). This is the first time in the play we see him and Antonio, so Will is giving us an introduction to them.

The former is the twin brother of the main character, Viola, and he will go on to play a small but important part in the play. Antonio not so much; he’s a bit superfluous. Sorry Antonio.

What about me, Mr. Blagys. I’m not superfluous, am I? By the way, what does superfluous mean?

It means pretty much unnecessary, Mojo. And no, you are not in any way superfluous.

 

Today’s Totally Random Lines

 

O Cassius, if you could

But win the noble Brutus to our party--

 

Cinna

Julius Caesar                 Act I, Scene iii, Line 141

The party to which Cinna refers is that party, of group of guys, which will ultimately assassinate Caesar. Of course, we know that Brutus will be joining that party, as he is noted in probably the most famous line of this play, spoken by Caesar as they are all stabbing him to death.

Et tu Brute?—Then fall, Caesar!     [Dies]

And you, Brutus, even you? Caesar is taken by surprise that his buddy Brutus is one of the assassins. And so it goes. What a perfect example of what Margaret was talking about in yesterday's Totally Random Daily Lines.

They that stand high have many blasts to shake them;

And if they fall, they dash themselves to pieces.

How about that? 

Mojo? How about that?

Zzzzzzzzz....

Well he's pretty jazzed about the whole thing, isn't he? 

 

Today’s Totally Random Lines

 

Good counsel, marry; -- learn it, learn it, marquess.                             

 

Duke of Gloster

King Richard the Third         Act I, Scene iii, Line 262

Okay, for starters, marry does not mean to wed. The good counsel is not to get married. Marry was a word used for emphasis. I think it was short for by Mary, like by God. Example: Well that’s a good idea by God! Marry, that’s a good idea! Got it?

So this leads to the question of what counsel? What is the good counsel that the marquess should learn? Well, let’s open this up.

 There's a bunch of people here and Margaret is ranting against all of them. She has reason to be ranting because her husband (Henry VI) was deposed and killed by this whole crew in front of her. She goes off on all of them, one by one and finally Marquess of Dorset (no relation to Tony) says

Dispute not with her, -- she is lunatic.

Which is not altogether wrong because Margaret is pretty off-balance if you know what I mean. Margaret replies to Dorset – and this is the counsel that Gloster says is good counsel, so pay attention. 

Peace, master marquess, you are malapert (disrespectful to a person of higher standing)

Your fire-new stamp of hounour is scarce current: (marquess only got to be a marquess lately because his sister married royalty)

O, that your young nobility could judge

What ‘twere to lose it, and be miserable!

They that stand high have many blasts to shake them;

And if they fall, they dash themselves to pieces.

And that’s the part, those last few lines, that Gloster says is good counsel. Let me repeat it,

They that stand high have many blasts to shake them;

And if they fall, they dash themselves to pieces.

What do you think? Good counsel? I mean, it doesn’t really apply too much to folk like you and I, but it is very relevant to the people at the top, and Will’s history plays are all about people at the top. No, I’m not going to get political. I could, but I’m not. In fact, I guess I’ll end it right there.

Phew, that was close! I was sure he was going to launch into one of his Orange Guy tirades. Again, PHEW!

 Today’s Totally Random Lines

 

                              Sir, she’s mortal;

But by immortal Providence she’s mine.

 

Ferdinand

The Tempest                   Act V, Scene i, Line 188

This is Ferdinand’s response to his father, Alonso, when the latter finds Ferdinand and Miranda playing chess. Alonso has asked,

Is she the goddess that hath severed us,
And brought us thus together?

Nope, not a goddess; just a mortal. Pretty good answer by Ferdinand though. 

No, this one’s not a goddess either, but by immortal Providence, this one’s mine (I’m talking about the one on the left: though, King Julian…not a bad catch).  

Sorry Mojo, I had to bump you this morning because I couldn’t pass up this pic for Today’s Lines.

No worries, Mr. Blagys, perfectly understandable. And besides, I've got one of my own.

Um, Mojo, I don’t think that one’s yours. I think Evan might have something to say about that.

Evan who?

Oh, never mind.