Today’s Totally Random Lines

 

Thou art not holy to belie me so;

I am not mad: this hair I tear is mine;

My name is Constance; I was Geffrey’s wife;

Young Arthur is my son, and he is lost:

I am not mad;-- I would to heaven I were!

 

Constance

King John            Act III, Scene iv, Line 47

Constance is not mad (off her rocker mad: not angry mad), but she wishes she were. If she were mad then maybe she would be able to forget about her murdered son. As it is, young Arthur is all she can think about.

Can you blame her?

 

Can I blame her?!? The nerve of this guy!

 Him and the Missus are constantly taking off on me, disappearing sometimes for days or weeks at a time! I don’t know if they're dead somewhere! 

Of course I don’t blame this poor lady for feeling how she does; I feel the same way half the time!

 

Today’s Totally Random Lines

  

Nay, I am sure she does. She came to him th’ other day into the compast window, - and, you know, he has not past three or four hairs on his chin-

 

Pandarus

Troilus and Cressida         Act I, Scene ii, Line 111

Pandarus is talking to Cressida. Pandarus is Cressida’s uncle, and he is also friend to Troilus. The latter is in love with Cressida, and Pandarus is doing everything he can to help Troilus. In this scene he is talking up Troilus, and that’s who they’re referring to above. Pandarus has said that he thinks Helen loves Troilus more than Paris, and Cressida answered Then she’s a merry Greek indeed. That’s when Pandarus gives us today’s line. By the way, a compast window is a round one. Yes, I had to look that up.

This play is confusing. I’ve never read, seen, or listened to it in its entirety. It’s loosely based on Homers Iliad. Remember in that story that Paris of Troy kidnapped Helen of Greece. Now the Greeks are at the walls of Troy besieging the city to rescue Helen. This play takes place partly in the Greek camp outside the city, partly inside the walls of Troy, and partly on the battlefield outside the walls. Pandarus, Cressida, and Troilus are Trojans, the latter being Paris’s brother. Somehow, and I'm not sure of the details, Cressida will be getting sent over to the Greeks in some sort of trade. It's confusing. 

This is the play that's in the First Folio without being in the table of contents of the First Folio. No kidding; there are thirty-six plays in the First Folio and only thirty-five in the table of contents. This one just shows up, unannounced, right before Coriolanus. How's that for confusing. 

Got all that?

I think so: Pandarus likes Cressida, and Troilus is a traitor for the Greeks, and nobody wrote this play. 

No, no, no: Troilus is... um... and Pandarus and Cress... uh....

Yeah, I think you've got it Mojo. 

 

Today’s Totally Random Lines

 

Let us withdraw into the other room.

 

Clarence

King Henry the Fourth Part II Act IV, Scene iv, Line 88

Clarence is Prince Henry’s brother, Thomas of Clarence, so why we’re not referring to him as Prince Thomas I’m not sure. Lots of people in the history plays have several names, like Clarence. His name is Thomas, but he’s the Duke of Clarence, so mostly he gets referred to as simply Clarence. I know, it’s a bit confusing. 

Anyway, Clarence, Gloster, Warwick, and Prince Henry are in King Henry’s bedroom, and Clarence is suggesting that they all get out of there and let the sleeping King Henry alone. How all these guys ended up in the king’s bedroom in the first place is beyond me, but there they are. 

It reminds me of that time that I was having back problems and I couldn’t move without intense pain. Patrice had to call an ambulance to take me into the hospital, and I found myself in my own bedroom with a couple of EMTs and a Cheshire cop: in my bedroom! With all the pain I was in it was still crossing my mind at the time, “what are all these people doing in my bedroom?”

Now, in the king’s case, he’s asleep. I have no idea if he’s suffering any back pain, but he’s asleep. Meantime, all these other guys are convinced that the king is on his deathbed. If I’m not mistaken, they’re right. Luckily for me, I was not on my deathbed. Also luckily for me, since I’ve been doing exercises since then to build up my core, my back has been a lot better. Knock on wood.

 

Hey, Mr. Blagys, I think you should stick to the Shakespeare stuff; nobody’s going to want to hear about the Cheshire cop in your bedroom.

 

 

Today’s Totally Random Lines

 

So to the laws at large I write my name:

[Subscribes]

And he that breaks them in the least degree

Stands in the attainder of eternal shame:

 

Berowne

Love’s Labour’s Lost         Act I, Scene i, Line 55

 

Berowne, Dumaine, and Longaville are going to spend the next three years studying with the king. Dumaine and Longaville have agreed to the specifics of the king’s provisions for these three years: no women, limited eating, and limited sleeping. They have signed the contract. Dumaine has agreed to the three years of studying, but has objected to the lack of women, food, and sleep, and at length tells why. Nevertheless, in the end he agrees to sign, as we see in Today’s Lines.

And so, the stage is now set for the action of the play.

I said, "And so, the stage is now set for the action of the play." Any comments?

Action, Schmaction. 

You want a comment? Don't bother me with your Shakespeare nonsense when I'm trying to sleep; how's that for a comment.

 

Today’s Totally Random Lines

 

What’s he comes here?

 King

All’s Well That Ends Well         Act I, Scene ii, Line 18

Well, there are several answers I could give to What’s he comes here?

Considering that it’s just about seven a.m., and Walker Peter’s got to be in to work at seven, I believe this is he that I hear coming down the hall.

Or, considering that it’s just about seven a.m., and the electronic picture frame turns on automatically at seven, I can see that it’s nephews John and Caleb showing up on the frame here in my living room all the way from Japan.

Or, more to the point, seeing that it’s the king asking the question, I can read ahead and tell you that the answer is Betram, Lafeu, and Parolles.

Which leads me to another discussion.

I went to Whitlock’s Book Barn yesterday, and I picked up yet one more book on Shakespeare; this one entitled Discovering Shakespeare by Edward Holmes. It’s a book about the conjecture that a fellow named Edward de Vere, Earl of Oxford wrote Shakespeare, and it’s based on the premise that de Vere had all these different experiences that the fellow who wrote these plays might have had: experiences that fit in very neatly to the plays, and experiences that Will never could have had.

The first play discussed in the book is, you guessed it, All’s Well That Ends Well. It explains who all these people in the play were in real life and the experiences that de Vere had with them (Bertram, by the way, is Edward de Vere according to Mr. Holmes).

Now, this is the second book I’ve got that works this same premise. Each of them go into the historical facts and characters of de Vere’s life (a life, unlike Will’s, that was quite well documented), but here’s the thing: neither of the books explains how de Vere’s words ended up with William Shakespeare as the listed author (granted that I’m only in chapter two of this new book, but I’ll keep you posted). They both seem to assume that it must’ve been de Vere as the author. But then, what about William Shakespeare? Who was he?

Whilst, as we well know, there is very little documented detail of Will’s life, we do in fact know that he existed and that he was given credit as the author. It is, however, the exponentially more documented detail of de Vere’s life that makes the arguments of these two authors so persuasive. Edward de Vere’s life fits so very well into the detail of the plays. But again, how do de Vere’s words end up credited as Shakespeare’s?

I’m hoping that Mr. Holmes comes up with some viable answer to this question. Perhaps Edward de Vere and William Shakespeare were friends who would meet and share stories of their lives over glasses of ale? And perhaps de Vere did a lot more sharing? This, at least, would still give Will authorship. 

Or perhaps, unlike Severus Snape, we’ll just

never

knooowwww.

 

The heck with this Snape guy, how about when my next treat will be showing up? 

Do we know that?  

 

Today’s Totally Random Lines

Sir John, I prithee, leave the prince and me alone: I will lay him down such reasons for this adventure, that he shall go.

Pointz

King Henry the Fourth Part I Act I, Scene ii, Line 153

All I’m going to look at this morning is I prithee. What does it mean? It’s a bastardization of I pray thee, and so it means, very simply, please. That’s right: please.

Sir John, please, leave the prince and me alone.

Perhaps you already knew that? If you did, I apologize for wasting your time. And if you didn’t, well, now you do. 

I prithee, Mojo, a penny for your thoughts. 

 

Today’s Totally Random Lines

 

Now, Signior Petruchio, how speed you with

My daughter?

Baptista

The Taming of the Shrew         Act II, Scene i, Line 18

This scene is the first meeting of Petruchio (the Tamer) and Katharina (the Shrew). Petruchio has come to tell Baptista (Katharina’s father) that he plans to marry her, so Baptista brings her in and then leaves to two alone to get acquainted. They’ve just spent a page going back and forth, and now Baptista comes back in to see how they’ve gotten along. How speed you simply means how’d you make out? Even though Katharina has given Petruchio nothing but sass, he replies, How but well, sir? How but well? It were impossible I should speed amiss. 

This Petruchio is indeed an interesting fellow.

Hey Mr. Blagys, I think this guy could play Petruchio; he's pretty interesting.

That guy has a name, Mojo: it's Jeff. And yes, he is very interesting.