Today’s Totally Random Lines

 

When did the tiger’s young ones teach the dam?

O, do not learn her wrath,--she taught it thee;

The milk thou suck’dst from her did turn to marble;

Even at thy teat thou hadst thy tyranny.

 

Lavinia

Titus Andronicus           Act II, Scene iii, Line 143

 

These are some of the last lines that Lavinia will have in this play. She won’t die until the last act, but a few lines further down from here she’ll be dragged off by Chiron and Demetrius who will rape her and then cut out her tongue and chop off her hands. So she won’t be saying much after this.

Right now though, Lavinia still has her tongue and she’s trying to talk to Tamora, the mother of these two guys, to get her to stop her sons from what they’re about to do. Demetrius responds by saying to his mother,

 

Listen, fair madam: let it be your glory

To see her tears; but be your heart to them

An unrelenting flint to drops of rain.

 

Be your heart to them (Lavinia’s tears)/An unrelenting flint to drops of rain. That's not bad. Anyway, that’s when Lavinia gives us Today’s Lines telling Demetrius not to try to teach his mother how to be cruel, because she’s the one who taught him.

 

These don’t sound like very nice people, Mr. Blagys.

They’re not, Mojo; not very nice at all. And unfortunately, these kinds of people are still with us today. Best to try to avoid them at all costs. 

 

Today’s Totally Random Lines

 

Now sways it (the battle) this way, like a mighty sea,

Forced by the tide to combat with the wind;

Now sways it that way, like the selfsame sea

Forced to retire by fury of the wind:

Sometime the flood prevails, and then the wind;

Now one the better, then another best;

Both tugging to be victors, breast to breast,

Yet neither conqueror nor conquered:

So is the equal poise of this fell war.

 

King Henry

King Henry the Sixth Part III   Act II, Scene v, Line 7

 

There’s that word fell again. Remember, in this case it has nothing to do with falling; it means simply evil.

And what of this passage?

Here we have King Henry pausing, alone, on the sidelines of a great battle. It is a battle that he should be leading, but is not. Whilst his queen and lieutenants run the show, he is left sitting there ruminating about the battle and the war. His musings are interesting and valid, but also a very sad reminder of what an ineffectual leader he is.

If this were Henry V, this king’s father, we’d be hearing “Once more into the breach!” and so on as he led the troops to into battle. But with the son, not so much. He’d rather ruminate on the vicissitudes of war than participate in it. 

Honestly, I think I am much more like the son than the father. Not very heroic of me, eh?

 

You’ll always be my hero, Mr. Blagys. Speaking of that, do you think my new hairdo makes me look fierce? 

Take a look at it from the back. What do you think?   Fierce?

Very fierce, Mojo. Very fierce indeed.

 

Today’s Totally Random Lines

My lord, your sorrow was too sore laid on,

Which sixteen winters cannot blow away,

So many summers dry; scarce any joy

Did ever so long live; no sorrow

But kill’d itself much sooner.

Camillo

The Winter’s Tale             Act V, Scene iii, Line 55

Once again, we’ve arrived at the end of the play. There are only about one hundred lines left in this, the last scene. Leontes and company have been led by Paulina to see a statue of his long dead wife Hermione. They are all marveling at the statue, and Leontes has just been moaning about how it’s all his fault that that his wife died all those years ago. In Today’s Lines Camillo is telling Leontes that he spent sixteen years being sorry, and that’s too long.

Yes, that’s all that he’s saying. Given that bit of context, Camillo’s lines should be pretty easy to understand. 

Yah, yah - easy to understand...never mind about that stuff;  what do you think about my haircut?

 

Today’s Totally Random Lines

  

The roof of the chamber

With golden cherubins is fretted: her andirons-

I had forgot them- were two winking Cupids

Of silver, each on one foot standing, nicely

depending on their brands.

 

Iachimo

Cymbeline             Act II, Scene iv, Line 88

Iachimo is describing the bedroom of Imogen, Posthumus’s wife. Iachimo made a bet with Posthumus that he, Iachimo, could seduce Imogen and get her to cheat on her husband. All he really did was sneak into Imogen’s bedroom without Imogen. He is describing the bedroom to Posthumus as proof that he slept with Imogen. He did no such thing, but gullible Posthumus believes him.

Iachimo/Posthumus, Iago/Othello; it’s all the same nonsense. One of them gets his hands on a hanky, and the other describes a bedroom. These husbands of Shakespeare need to have a little more faith in their wives! Just wow.

I'm glad I'm not married. 

 

Today’s Totally Random Lines

 

Help, Jupiter; or we appeal,

And from thy justice fly.

 

Both Brothers (of Posthumus)

Cymbeline             Act V, Scene iv, Line 91

 

Okay, here’s the deal: Posthumus has been thrown in prison, though I’m not sure for what. But whatever it is, I’m pretty sure it’s unfair. Now he’s having a dream, so this is a dream sequence. His whole family is here, though they are all dead and gone: his mother and father and his two brothers. They are all begging the gods to let up on Posthumus saying that he’s suffering unjustly. Today’s line is his two brothers asking Jupiter for his help. And that’s about it.

Yes, that's right, it’s a dream sequence.  

It would be great to be able to see this guy's dream sequence...

Treats !

Treats !

Treats !

Treats !

Treats !

 

Today’s Totally Random Lines

 

Thou art not holy to belie me so;

I am not mad: this hair I tear is mine;

My name is Constance; I was Geffrey’s wife;

Young Arthur is my son, and he is lost:

I am not mad;-- I would to heaven I were!

 

Constance

King John            Act III, Scene iv, Line 47

Constance is not mad (off her rocker mad: not angry mad), but she wishes she were. If she were mad then maybe she would be able to forget about her murdered son. As it is, young Arthur is all she can think about.

Can you blame her?

 

Can I blame her?!? The nerve of this guy!

 Him and the Missus are constantly taking off on me, disappearing sometimes for days or weeks at a time! I don’t know if they're dead somewhere! 

Of course I don’t blame this poor lady for feeling how she does; I feel the same way half the time!

 

Today’s Totally Random Lines

  

Nay, I am sure she does. She came to him th’ other day into the compast window, - and, you know, he has not past three or four hairs on his chin-

 

Pandarus

Troilus and Cressida         Act I, Scene ii, Line 111

Pandarus is talking to Cressida. Pandarus is Cressida’s uncle, and he is also friend to Troilus. The latter is in love with Cressida, and Pandarus is doing everything he can to help Troilus. In this scene he is talking up Troilus, and that’s who they’re referring to above. Pandarus has said that he thinks Helen loves Troilus more than Paris, and Cressida answered Then she’s a merry Greek indeed. That’s when Pandarus gives us today’s line. By the way, a compast window is a round one. Yes, I had to look that up.

This play is confusing. I’ve never read, seen, or listened to it in its entirety. It’s loosely based on Homers Iliad. Remember in that story that Paris of Troy kidnapped Helen of Greece. Now the Greeks are at the walls of Troy besieging the city to rescue Helen. This play takes place partly in the Greek camp outside the city, partly inside the walls of Troy, and partly on the battlefield outside the walls. Pandarus, Cressida, and Troilus are Trojans, the latter being Paris’s brother. Somehow, and I'm not sure of the details, Cressida will be getting sent over to the Greeks in some sort of trade. It's confusing. 

This is the play that's in the First Folio without being in the table of contents of the First Folio. No kidding; there are thirty-six plays in the First Folio and only thirty-five in the table of contents. This one just shows up, unannounced, right before Coriolanus. How's that for confusing. 

Got all that?

I think so: Pandarus likes Cressida, and Troilus is a traitor for the Greeks, and nobody wrote this play. 

No, no, no: Troilus is... um... and Pandarus and Cress... uh....

Yeah, I think you've got it Mojo.