If you’ll avouch ‘twas wisdom Paris went,-

As you must needs, for you all cried, ‘Go, go;’

If you’ll confess he brought home noble prize-

As you must needs, for you all clapt your hands,

And cried, ‘Inestimable!’- why do you now

The issue of your proper wisdoms rate,

And do a deed that fortune never did,-

Beggar the estimation which you prized

Richer than the sea and land?

 

-Troilus

Troilus and Cressida              Act II Scene ii, Line 89

 

That’s the argument for not surrendering up Helen to the Greeks to put an end to the siege of Troy. Priam, the king of Troy, is in conference with his sons, Hector, Troilus, Paris, and Helenus (yes, Helenus is a guy). The Greeks have sent a message that if the Trojans give up Helen now, all will be forgiven and the Greeks will leave. Hector and Helenus are in favor of giving up Helen. Troilus and Paris are not. As a reminder, Paris is the one who went and stole her from the Greeks in the first place.

I listened to the whole scene this morning (it’s only a little over 200 lines) and it’s very interesting. Hector and Helenus are arguing that reason dictates they should give up Helen; she’s just not worth all these people dying for. Today’s Totally Random lines, which is one long sentence, is the crux of Troilus’s argument.

There’s a couple of other things in this scene, though not in today’s line, that bear mentioning. One is the term cormorant war, and the other is the phrase Whose price hath launcht above a thousand ships. The former uses the word cormorant, a diving bird that feeds on fish, to mean all devouring. I thought that was pretty cool. The latter is, I suppose, the actual line that is commonly remembered as the face that launched a thousand ships. It’s Troilus who says

        Is she worth keeping? Why, she is a pearl,

        Whose price hath launcht above a thousand ships,

        And turned crowned kings to merchants.

 So the next time you hear someone talking about the face that launched a thousand ships, you can give them the full, correct rendering. 

Addendum: The Google has just informed me that the face that launched a thousand ships is a direct quote from Christopher Marlowe’s Doctor Faustus, written around 1604. Since Will wrote Troilus and Cressida around 1602 (both dates are approximate), I think we can assume Will inspired Marlowe’s line. And we’ll leave it at that.

This is the Great Cormorant from my Audubon Society Baby Elephant Folio. Does he look all devouring? I think he does, a little bit.  

 Yes.

-Gardiner

King Henry the Eighth           Act VI Scene ii, Line 39

 

That’s gotta be in competition for the shortest Totally Random line ever. I guess I could go through the archives (or in my case Excel spreadsheet) and see if we had No, or perhaps Ah, or maybe I? Well, I’m not going to do that right now.

What’s that you say? Yes, I should. Sadly, I repeat, no, I’m not going to do that right now. Sorry.

So that's a big thumbs up yes for today. Yes to what? I dunno. But I don't know what Gardiner was saying yes to either, so I guess we're all good. Yes, we are.

 

Perform’d to point the tempest that I bade thee?

 

-Prospero

The Tempest                    Act I Scene ii, Line 193

 

Okay, we know this one, don’t we? I hope you do. It’s Prospero talking to Ariel and asking him if he’s done everything that he’s been told to do. And, of course, Ariel has.

Are we done?    

 

            By him that justly may

Bear his betrothed from all the world away.

 

-Bassianus

Titus Andronicus                     Act I Scene i, Line 286

 

This is truly a strange play. Granted, Will wrote it early in his career. In fact, I believe this qualifies as his first crack at a tragedy. And it’s definitely a tragedy. Heck, just about everyone dies in this one, including Titus. But there’s so much plotting, and changing sides, and just weird stuff going on. And Lavinia, Titus’s daughter, seems to be caught in the middle of much of the action, starting here in Act I (she is the betrothed being mentioned in today’s Totally Random line) and ending in the final scene of the play where her father kills her. Yeah, Titus kills his daughter. That’s what I mean: this whole play is just a bit fakakta. I mean, it’s still like a game of golf: a bad day of golf is still better than a good day at work, and a lesser work of Will is still better than just about any other writing. Nevertheless, a bit fakakta.

Here's a good example of fakakta. The wood in this pencil goes right up through the middle of the graphite. I've never seen anything like this in a pencil before. This pencil is a bit fakakta.

 

Go, then; for ‘tis in vain

To seek him here that means not to be found.

 

-Benvolio

Romeo and Juliet                    Act I Scene ii, Line 41

 

Benvolio is talking to Mercutio. Romeo was with these guys, but he’s given them the slip and hopped the wall into the Capulet’s orchard. Now these two guys are about to stop looking for him. Two lines further on is Romeo's famous But soft! What light through yonder window breaks? But we didn’t randomly pick that line, we randomly picked Go, then; for ‘tis in vain. It was in the roll of the die.

So let’s think about this: if you stopped a hundred different people on the street… well if you stopped a hundred different people there’s a decent chance one of them would shoot you. But if you could read both of these lines, the Go, then line and the But soft line to a hundred different people, there’s a pretty good chance that at least a handful would place the But soft line. There’s almost a zero chance that even one would place the Go, then line.

And what do we sift from this? I’m not sure; perhaps the craziness that exists in the randomness of it all. Yeah, let’s go with that. And to be clear, when I say it all I mean everything. Everything!

 

Okay, the pics don't get much more random than this. Kinda funny, but definitely random.

 

Beside the charge, the shame, the imprisonment,

You have done wrong to this my honest friend;

 

-Angelo

The Comedy of Errors         Act V Scene i, Line 18

 

Well, what have we here. Yet another of the myriad of misunderstandings  and cases of mistaken identity that make up The Comedy of Errors. So it really is a comedy that is all about errors. It couldn’t be more aptly named. I think I’ll leave at that for today. 

No pic. No nothin’

Enjoy the day!

 

 

I was as virtuously given as a gentleman need to be; virtuous enough; swore little; diced not above seven times a week; went to a bawdy-house not above once in a quarter -- of an hour; paid money that I borrowed -- three or four times; lived well, and in good compass: and now I live out of all order, out of all compass.

 

-Sir John Falstaff

King Henry the Fourth Part I      Act III Scene iii, Line 20

 

Good old Falstaff. This is classic Falstaff, rambling on and on, and talking mostly about himself. I guess you can take it for what it’s worth, and context is almost irrelevant here. I will tell you that the word compass is taken to mean moderation or limits, and also that I don’t think Sir John ever lived in good compass. And that’s about all I feel I need to tell you about these lines.

I just realized who Falstaff reminds me of in my own life: Johnny Stevens. I wish I had a picture of Johnny, but alas I don’t.

Wrong again! I do have a picture of him.

That's Johnny on the far left. To the right of Johnny, making a funny face, is Steve Mikune, and to the right of Steve is yours truly. And you thought we were reaching back into the archives with the ND patch yesterday. This photo goes back even further!