Today’s Totally Random Lines

 

Why, he hackt at it with his dagger; and said he would swear truth out of England, but he would make you believe it was done in fight; and persuaded us to do the like.

 

Peto

King Henry the Fourth Part I    Act II Scene iv, Line 312

Falstaff has just told Prince Hal the story of how he, Falstaff, and his friends fought off eleven attackers. Hal knows the story is a complete fabrication, so he asks Peto, one of Falstaff’s fellows, how Falstaff’s sword got so hacked up. And that’s what Peto’s talking about above. So basically, Falstaff made up a story and then nicked up his sword to make it look like he really had been in a fight. And he had his buddies do the same. That is classic Falstaff.

A little bit about Sir John Falstaff. This is one of Shakespeare’s most well known, and well loved characters. Oddly, he is little known to the world outside of Shakespereans (for lack of a better word). Whilst the character of Hamlet has the most lines of anyone in one play, Falstaff has the most lines in all of Shakespeare’s works because he appears in three plays.

Falstaff is a common man. He is a glutton, a heavy drinker, a jokester, and a con man. He steals almost any scene he appears in, and is a big crowd favorite. Maybe you can think of a Falstaff in your life. Most of us have one.

 

 

We've got this guy; he’s jokester, a scene stealer, and definitely a con man.

That’s right 'Falstaff', I knew all along that wasn’t a ‘cigarillo.’ I know a treat when I see one. Not looking for a light today, are we?

 

 

Today’s Totally Random Lines

 

This should be the same voice of Friar John.—

Welcome from Mantua: what says Romeo?

Or, if his mind be writ, give me the letter.

 

Friar Laurence

Romeo and Juliet    Act V Scene ii, Line 2

And here comes the part that makes this play a tragedy. Or maybe it should be called The Comedy Of The Friars?

In any event, recall that Romeo’s been banished, and Friar Knucklehead Laurence has concocted a plan whereby Juliet fakes her death with a sleeping potion, and then Romeo will come back and meet her at the graveyard and they can run away together. So the Friar sends a message to Romeo in Mantua via Knucklehead # 2 (aka Friar John) to let Romeo in on the plan. Now Knucklehead #2 is back and Knucklehead # 1 is looking for Romeo’s response. But, uh oh, now what? Did you deliver the letter to Romeo, Friar John?

        Going to find a barefoot brother out,

One of our order, to associate me,

Here in this city visiting the sick,

And finding him, the searchers of the town,

Where the infectious pestilence did reign,

Seal’d up the doors, and would not let us forth;

So that my speed to Mantua there was stayed.

Long story short, Tony, long story short. What happened to the letter?

I could not send it,- here it is again,-

Nor get a messenger to bring it to thee,

So fearful were thy of infection.

Oh, you gotta be kidding me. So this guy had one job in this play: get the message to Romeo. Well, here comes the tragedy: Romeo doesn't get the message from Friar Laurence (or John), but he does get the public news that Juliet is dead. So he’ll show up at the graveyard, where she hasn’t woken up yet, thinking she’s really dead, and… well, you know the rest.

Gotta love those Friars. 

 

 I think you're being a little unfair to the friars, Mr. Blagys. They clearly did the best they could. Sort of like you automatically assumed it was my fault for chewing on your shoe laces when the lace broke.

Oh, for cryin' out loud Mojo, you know you chewed that lace!

 

 

Today’s Totally Random Lines

 

Pardon, sir; I have heard the word. Phrase call you it? By this good day, I know not the phrase; but I will maintain the word with my sword to be a soldier-like word, and a word of exceeding good command by Heaven.

 

Bardolf

King Henry the Fourth Part II    Act III Scene ii, Line 78

 

This little back and forth between Shallow and Bardolf centers on the word accommodate, which apparently has some significant meaning in sixteenth century parlance.

Okay, here’s the part where you proclaim, ‘see, this stuff is crazy. How am I supposed to understand what they’re talking about here.’ Well, I suppose you raise a somewhat valid point, and I'm afraid I just don't feel like arguing today. So we'll leave it at that.

 

No Mojo, I' not going to argue with you either, and I'm certainly not going to 'accommodate' you with a light. I told you yesterday, NO LIGHT! And by the way, I know that's not even a real cigar you've got there. I don't know who you think you're kidding.