Today’s Totally Random Lines

 

Thou shalt inquire him out among the Goths:

 

Titus      

Titus Andronicus           Act V, Scene ii, Line 123

 

This is part of an eight-line sentence full of commas, colons, and semi-colons. I was gonna give you the whole eight lines, but thought better of it, so you just got Thou shalt inquire him out among the Goths.

I mean, that’s enough, isn’t it?

 

Yes!! That’s enough!!

 

Today’s Totally Random Lines

 

So would not I, for your own sake; for I have many ill qualities.

 

Margaret

Much Ado About Nothing            Act II Scene i, Line 96

Margaret is talking with Balthazar; he is telling her that he likes her, and she is telling him not to bother. 

Well, I would you did like me, is Balthazar’s line that Margaret is replying to.

I believe that it’s often syntax, the order of the words in a sentence, that makes Shakespeare hard to understand. And this is why it’s easier to understand when listened to, because if the speaker is someone who knows what the lines mean, they can accent the words in such a way so that it makes the odd order of the words more comprehensible. 

I can think of three reasons for Will using odd syntax: By playing with the syntax he can gain emphasis on different things where he wants it. By playing with syntax he can make the lines properly metrical. Finally, in some cases the syntax he is using was probably the order of the words that was more usual back in 1690.

Syntax.  

Let’s take today’s lines. I guess the other issue today is the use of the word would. Wish is a word that might make this clearer.

Well, I would you did like me.

Well, I wish you liked me. I changed did like to liked.

So would not I. 

I wouldn’t (wish that). I put I at the beginning of the sentence.

If you think of this stuff as Yoda speak, maybe that would make it easier. It occurs to me that no one seems to object to Yoda’s syntax, and it’s not that different from Will’s.

Again, Syntax.

Again, welcome aboard.

And here's what Mojo thinks about syntax.

Going,

Going,

  

Gone!

 

Today’s Totally Random Lines

For him, I think not on him; for his thoughts,

Would they were blanks, rather than fill’d with me!

Olivia

Twelfth Night                Act III Scene i, Line 106

Regarding him (Duke Orsino), I don’t think about him at all; regarding his thoughts, it would be better off if his thoughts were about nothing than to be about me.

There. That’s Pete’s version. Pretty simple. It wasn’t that simple when I first read it. But it turns out that it is pretty simple. Sometimes things can seem more difficult at first, but then they come into focus and you realize they’re pretty straightforward. 

I think there’s two things to talk about here, and they’re very related. One is simplicity, and the other is thoughts. So let’s open this up

What Olivia’s saying is simple to understand, and the idea she’s conveying is simple too. Tell the duke to stop thinking about me. Simple as that. But is it so simple to stop thinking about things? Not always. 

And this is true the stressful world of April, 2025 that we’re living in and through.

I think Taylor Swift said it best: Leading up to the election she said that she was voting for Kamala and one of the main reasons was that we needed calm leadership, not chaos and crisis. Well, we got chaos and crisis, and I think we’re all feeling the effects of that now. I know I am. I can do my best to try to pull up, but it’s just not always possible for me. 

It’s as simple and as difficult as that.

 

This little guy here helps me a lot. He helps me pull up (get my thoughts out of the day-to-day stress), and he helps me keep it simple. 

 

Today’s Totally Random Lines

 

‘Have done,’ quoth he: ‘my uncontrolled tide
Turns not, but swells the higher by this let.
Small lights are soon blown out, huge fires abide,
And with the wind in greater fury fret:
The petty streams that pay a daily debt
     To their salt sovereign, with their fresh falls’                     haste

     Add to his flow, but alter not his taste.

 

Tarquin

 Lucrece                         Line  651

Now from where I’m sitting, if I give you just a little context, I believe you should have no problem understanding exactly what Tarquin is saying. But unfortunately, I think I’m probably wrong in that assumption.

Let’s try anyway.

This is Tarquin talking. He’s stolen into Lucrece’s bedroom late at night with the intent of having his way with her. She is scared to death and wants no part of him. That’s not going to stop him. Remember, the poem is alternately titled Lucrece or The Rape Of Lucrece. Our victim has just spent a number of lines trying to talk Tarquin out of raping her. Today’s lines are part of Tarquin’s response to this plea. And one more bit of help: the word let in the second line can be taken to mean obstacle. In this case he’s referring to the obstacle of her trying to stop him.

Soooo, got it? Probably not. 

Okay, here’s the Pete's short version:
First two lines: Stop talking. You’re not going to stop me, you’re just making me want to do this more.
Next two lines: Like a large fire that grows bigger in a wind, my urge grows stronger with your resisting it.
Last three: Okay, I can’t quite figure out what this metaphor is saying, but I’m pretty sure it’s more of the same.

Now do you see it?

  

 See what? Is there another mouse?

Never mind, Mojo.

 

Today’s Totally Random Lines

 

Methinks the realms of England, France, and Ireland

Bear that proportion to my flesh and blood

As did the fatal brand Althaea burn’d

Unto the prince’s heart of Calydon.

 

Duke of York

King Henry the Sixth Part II        Act I Scene i, Line 233

It just so happens that this very line is explained by Isaac Asimov in his Asimov’s Guide To Shakespeare. The Duke of York has been talking to himself about the fact that he's going to steal the throne from Henry, and this line is a reference to how important it is for him to take over the power. 

Here’s Asimov –

This is a reference to Meleager of Calydon, whose life would last only so long as a brand in the keeping of his mother, Althaea, remained unburned. Richard feels the loss of his realm will kill him just as surely as the burning of the brand would kill Meleager.

 And there you have it.

I was so proud of myself for being able to come up with this perfect explanation of Althaea and Calydon-

 

And then Mojo spotted the mouse, and that was the end of that short-lived, proud moment.

 

Today’s Totally Random Lines

 

Lords, to the field; Saint George and victory!

 

King Edward

King Henry the Sixth Part III               Act V Scene i, Line 113

We’re near the end of the Henry III plays, and as you can see, Edward is the king now. I forget the specific chain of events, but I know that Edward usurps the throne from Henry (twice, actually), before Richard then grabs it from Edward’s young son. But that’s the next play in line: Richard the Third, and we're not there yet.

First we have to get through the battle that Edward is leading the charge into. And don’t ask me what battle this is, because I don’t know. There’s lots of battles between the forces of Edward and the forces of Henry in the Henry VI plays. As I said, the crown goes back and forth between Henry had Edward three times before it’s over. But it’s almost over. I think this is the last Edward vs Henry battle. Actually, in a lot of these battles it’s Edward vs Margaret, Henry’s wife. Yeah, Henry has trouble putting on his big boy pants for some of these battles, so that Margaret has to lead the troops. I’m not sure if that’s the case here.
 
I suppose we could have gotten by with a bit less of an explanation for a simple line like this. Something along the lines of
This is King Edward leading his forces into battle with the forces of King Henry.

There, how’s that?

Too late. I lost the guy already to...heck, I have no idea what Jeff's reading to him. Oh well, I guess everybody needs a break from Shakespeare once in a while.

 

Today’s Totally Random Lines

 

Away with them to prison; and the day

Of combat shall be the last of next month.-

Come, Somerset, we’ll see thee sent away.

 

King Henry

King Henry the Sixth Part II         Act I Scene iii, Line 220

It seems a little arbitrary that Henry is assigning the day of combat to be the last day of next month. I wonder where that comes from? Also, I added the line about Somerset (which doesn't have anything to do with the combat) because this is the end of the scene, so it didn’t feel right leaving that last line out.

So apparently combat will be the way to settle the question of which of these two guys is telling the truth. They are a couple of nearly anonymous henchmen. The first, Thomas Horner, is being accused of treason for saying that Richard, Duke of York was the rightful king of England. The accuser, the guy who heard him say this, is his servant, Peter; no last name - just Peter. Another Peter; can you believe it?

Anyway, since it’s a case of he said, he said, and there are no witnesses, the only solution is for these two to fight it out. And that’s what they’ll settle on the day of combat, the last of next month. They both get to sit in prison until then.

Now Peter’s got but two lines in the play, and they’re both kind of interesting, so we’ll take a look at them.
He gets some stage direction for his first line which is after Thomas Horner calls him a liar, saying he never spoke the traitorous words.

[holding up his hands]
By these ten bones, my lords, he did speak them to me in the garret one night, as we were scouring my Lord of York’s armour.

So, he’s swearing on his ten fingers that Horner said what he said he said. That seems a little odd – swearing on his ten fingers?

And his other line is after he’s been told that he’ll have to do combat with Thomas Horner to decide who’s telling the truth.

Alas, my lord, I cannot fight; for God’s sake, pity my case! The spite of man prevaileth against me. O Lord, have mercy upon me! I shall never be able to fight a blow: O Lord, my heart!

I’m not quite clear to me why he cant’ fight. Is it because he has ten boney fingers? Or perhaps because he won’t fight his master? Or maybe he’s just a puny little guy who doesn’t stand a chance against Thomas Horner? Or is he saying that his heart will give out?

I’m pretty sure, though not positive, that we never get to see these two again, so that we’ll never know what happens. Their fate is of little consequence. Their part in the play was to bring up the question of the Duke of Gloster’s fidelity to the king. To be sure, the Duke and the question of his fidelity will certainly come up again.

Meantime, sounds like Peter No-Last-Name is a lover, not a fighter. He also sounds a little like Fred Sanford. Remember Fred Sanford? My heart! I’m coming to see you, Elizabeth!

Sanford And Son: This Is The Big One! - YouTube

  

Fred Sanford, Fred Sanford. That name rings a bell.

Hmmm, Fred Sanford…