No, they cannot touch me for coining. I am the King himself.

-Lear

King Lear             Act IV, scene vi Line 83

Lear! Yah, there’s a bunch of Shakespeare gurus out there who think this is Will’s masterpiece. Better than Hamlet and all the rest. Is it? I dunno. It’s a good one, no doubt about that.

It’s the story of a King who’s getting on in years who decides to divide up his kingdom among his three daughters while he’s still alive. Only problem is that two of those daughters turn out to be, well not very nice, and things don’t go too well for him (actually, things don’t go too well for just about anyone in the story). At this point in the play Lear has been driven out of house and home and he’s gone a bit mad. Gloucester and his son Edgar are out wandering on the heath (they’ve just concluded a scene where Edgar helps his blind father think that he’s jumped off a cliff) when they run into Lear. The stage direction says ‘Enter Lear fantastically dressed with wild flowers.’ If I’m not mistaken, Ian McKellen took that ‘fantastically’ part to heart and did this scene in the nude a few years ago, which I’m kind of glad I missed. No offense Ian, but well…

Anyway, Today’s Totally Random Daily Shakespeare line is the first thing that Lear says when he shows up in the scene. And it’s not supposed to make all that much sense. Considering that coining means minting coins, or perhaps counterfeiting, the meaning is pretty straight forward. Not that it makes much sense for him to be saying it, but it’s not supposed to. He follows it up with a bunch of disjointed phrases about all sorts of unrelated stuff.

Now we can go into an in depth analysis of this line and the few that follow it to figure out all the symbolism and whatnot that Will put in here. And trust me, there’s plenty in here and it’s been plenty analyzed in the past four hundred years (and don’t let me stop you if that’s what you want to do; go at it and let me know what you come up with). But, to quote John Blutarsky, that could take years and cost millions of lives. And I’m not prepared to pay that price this morning. So let’s just say this might be a perfect line for you to use when you want to throw something out there that’s completely non-sequitur. Now this may sound a little silly to a lot of you, and I imagine there are those of you who never do that, but I find it can be helpful for a number of different occasions. Maybe you’re having an argument that’s just about to degenerate into an all-out fight and you want to derail it before it gets there. Just throw this out there; ‘NO, they cannot touch me for coining. I am the King himself!’ They’re gonna look at you like you’re a bit daft, but that’s the whole point. I don’t suggest taking your clothes off like Ian did. But what have you got to lose? Maybe it works, maybe it doesn’t. Either way you get to use a line from Shakespeare’s King Lear! So what's better than that?

                     

O me, lieutenant! What villains have done this?

-Iago

Othello                 Act V, scene i     Line 55

Well if we’re going to do a quote from Othello we can’t do better than Iago! This guy, if you didn’t know it, is widely considered the best villain that Shakespeare ever created. And if you were thinking that Iago was just the Gilbert Gottfried voiced parrot in the movie Aladdin, well I think it’s time we widened your horizons a wee bit.

So Iago is the guy in the play who starts all the bad stuff happening. If I recall, Iago’s main issue is that he gets passed over for promotion by Othello in favor of Cassio, a younger guy, so now he’s just gonna be a real nasty little creep and do everything he can to ruin everyone’s lives. And he does a pretty good job of it. And the thing is that he’s Othello’s right hand man and Othello has no idea that Iago is a bad guy until the very end of the play.

Today’s Totally Random Daily Shakespeare line is a perfect example of Iago’s treachery. His question is to Cassio who’s been sliced in the back of the leg. But the answer to ‘what villain?’ is himself. Iago! Iago snuck up behind Cassio, sliced him, and ran without being seen. Then he’s back a little while later pretending he was never there, and pretending to be shocked over what happened to Cassio. We couldn’t have picked a better line to show the spirit of Iago and this play if we had spent hours poring over the text! Amazing! Either this random stuff actually works or, more likely, Shakespeare’s texts are so packed full of good stuff that it’s hard to come up with a bad line!

So I guess this is the line you can use when mom discovers that someone (you) has eaten the whole container of mint chip ice cream and put the empty container back in the freezer. If you walk in the kitchen and see her looking with disappointment at the empty container you can try this line, “What villain has done this!” The thing is, your mom is probably smarter than Cassio and she’ll look right back at you and say “You know damn well what villain, Porky!”  

Come your ways.---My masters, you say she’s a virgin?

-Boult

Pericles                 Act IV, scene ii   Line 40

Well we’ve got a few interesting things that we can talk about this morning. Let’s start with the play we ended up with. Pericles was a real person in Greek history, a great leader. But this play is not about the real life of Pericles but rather some made up adventures of Pericles. Also, this play is generally considered to be only partially (the second half of the play) written by Shakespeare and the first half written by some other guy. Finally, I suppose to lend some credence to this latter assumption, this play is NOT included in the First Folio, and that’s got to mean something.

Okay, let’s go into a few sentences on the First Folio, for those of you who don’t know what that is. The only publications of Will’s plays during his lifetime were done surreptitiously, mostly printed as Quatros (sort of like pamphlets) and without Will or his theater group’s consent. Around seven years after Will’s death two of his associates from his theater group put together a definitive collection of Will’s works and published it as a bound volume (a book). It has become known as the First Folio. Around half of the plays in the First Folio existed nowhere in print before the First Folio and if these two guys hadn’t published this book all those plays would have been lost. So kudos to those two guys (John Heminges and Henry Condell). There are a few hundred original copies of this book still kicking around today and, as you can imagine, they’re a bit pricey. If you want one, consider selling your house, and maybe a few neighbor’s houses.  We could spend a lot of time talking about the First Folio (whole books have been written about it, and I’ve read at least one of them) but let’s move on for now.

So there are a handful of plays that show up on various lists of Shakespeare’s plays that are not in the First Folio. Pericles is the one play in my complete works compilation that’s not in the First Folio. There are four or five others that aren’t in my book or the First Folio (and therefore we obviously won’t be drawing any lines from those). And then one last note; Today’s line comes from well past the halfway point in the play so, ostensibly, today’s line was actually written by Will. But who really knows?

Okay, what about the line? Well, I’m not sure about the ‘Come your ways’. I believe that’s just a 1600’s jargon intro’ish type phrase. Sort of like ‘All rightee then mates.’ But I don’t have any authoritative work to back that up. Anyway, the meat of the line is exactly what it looks like. These guys are bartering for Marina (she was born at sea, hence the name; get it?) to use as a sex slave for profit, and they want to know if she’s a virgin, which apparently she is. But wait, it’s not all that bad as it turns out. Marina is sold into slavery, but she manages to convert all the clients sent to her to more pure ways, and so in the end there is no prostitution taking place, and then eventually she is reunited with her father Pericles (This is, after all, a comedy, for whatever that’s worth).

And that’s pretty much the story of today’s Totally Random Daily Shakespeare line.

Come, let me see what task I have to do.

-Titus Andronicus

Titus Andronicus              Act III, scene i    Line 275

What a simple, little, easy to understand line. And how ironic to have randomly picked it from such a bizarre play. I could easily ramble on about how we can use that line in everyday situations. Granted, it would be a little bit stilted to say these exact words. Can you imagine the person sitting at the desk near you at work, or perhaps in study hall, and they say out loud to themselves, “Come, let me see what task I have to do.” First off you might think they’re a bit goofy for talking out loud to themselves, but beyond that you’d probably think them goofy for the style of language, but beyond that you would certainly understand what they’re saying. And based on what they’re saying you wouldn’t be particularly engaged. It’s just a simple little line. “Okay, what’s next on the to-do list?” Right?

And yet, this play is just one bizarre, violent scene after another. Severed heads, slaughtering prisoners, mutilated bodies, cannibalism, rapes… it’s a Sam Peckinpah smorgasbord. In fact, it’s sometimes hard to reconcile it as a Shakespearean work. At least it is for me.

Now I’ve read/listened to this one a few years back. It’s one of Will’s early works. And if I’m not mistaken, most of the big Will thinkers don’t spend much time with this one. Also (and I looked this next one up), it’s only been made into a movie once, in 1999 with Anthony Hopkins in the title role.

But getting back to today’s Totally Random Daily Shakespeare; “Come, let me see what task I have to do.” The really bizarre, and very spooky, thing about this line is that it appears to be so innocuous, when it is anything but. It appears to be a line that you’d say while sitting there having a cup of coffee. “Should I finish washing the dishes, or should I go bring in the empty garbage cans? What task should I take care of?” In fact, Titus utters this line shortly after he has been tricked into cutting off his own hand, and then had his sons’ two severed heads presented to him. The task about which he is uncertain has to do with a response to these matters, these very bizarre matters. The expected line would be something more along the lines of “WHAT THE HELL I’M I GONNA DO NOW!!!” But that wouldn’t be half as spooky. Instead, and I really would love to see Anthony Hopkins say this, instead Titus says simply “Come, let me see what task I have to do.” I can just picture Hopkins saying that with one of his hands missing and the severed heads of his sons sitting there.  And that, my friends, is the genius of Shakespeare (and maybe Anthony Hopkins).

It is myself I mean; in whom I know

All the particulars of vice so grafted

That, when they shall be opened, black Macbeth

Will seem as pure as snow and the poor state

Esteem him as a lamb, being compared

With my confineless harms.

-Malcom

Macbeth              Act IV, scene iii  Line 50-55

Yes, that’s right; Macbeth two days in a row! Honest, it’s random!

It seems that yesterday you got off easy. I could have gone on a bit about that line, but I’m afraid I let my writing go late into the day (instead of first thing like I usually do) and I ran out of gas. But not so this morning. So today we’ll move on and try to get you your money’s worth.

To get you on the right footing here, Macbeth is a play about a good guy gone terribly wrong. So wrong that by the end of the play (evidenced in yesterday’s line), everyone is comforted by seeing Macbeth’s severed head on a spike. That’s gone pretty wrong. And in the beginning he’s described as a bit of a hero. A brutal hero, but fighting on the right side of the King.

Today’s line takes place three quarters of the way through the play. Malcom is the son of the king that Macbeth has murdered, and Macduff (who he’s speaking to) is with him. They are in England trying to figure out what to do about Macbeth who has taken over the kingship of Scotland and ruining the country in the meantime. At this point Malcom plans to lead a revolt to get his rightful kingship back, but he wants to test Macduff to make sure his motives are pure. He’s testing Macduff by trying to convince him that he, Malcom, is a really bad guy (in fact, worse than Macbeth) and that he would be very bad for Scotland if he got power. Macduff will fail the test if he will follow Malcom anyway, or pass the test if he would reject Malcom and instead put Scotland’s better interests first. (spoiler alert, he passes).

So that’s a long explanation for a long line! It turns out that Malcom is a true blue guy; true to goodness, not any one person. In the end Macduff chooses Scotland’s better interests over Malcom, but then Malcom lets Macduff know it’s a test and they go off to get Scotland back from Macbeth. (yes, it is a little confusing, but if you saw it performed it would be clearer).

Now I think it’s really interesting that this play is about the blackness of Macbeth (I mean that’s really what it’s all about) and that in two successive days we picked two totally random lines (out of about 2,500 lines in this play) and both specifically highlight what a really bad guy this Macbeth is. The first pronouncing the comfort to be received seeing his severed head, and the second literally describing him as ‘black Macbeth’. And they say there’s no such thing as coincidence. In the acting world they have some crazy superstition about this play so that they won’t even say the name of the play, they just refer to it as ‘the Scottish play’. That’s how crazy this whole thing gets. Well hopefully we’ll get back to this Scottish play again at a later date not too far in the future. There’s just tons of good stuff in this one to talk about.

Here comes newer comfort.

-Seyward

Macbeth              Act V, scene viii Line 92

Aye, that Scottish play. Now we’ve tapped into a good one! I studied this one in my MAT class about ten years ago, but I've not looked at it since, so I’m a bit rusty with it. But, like Hamlet, Lear, and Othello, it is one of Shakespeare’s classic tragedies.

Now just consider what comes right after this line. Seyward has just concluded his discussion and thoughts of his son who just got killed in battle with the words 'And so God be with him.' But then he quickly changes the subject with today's Totally Random line 'Here come newer comfort.' And what is he referring to? His line in the play's text is immediately followed by the stage direction 'Enter Macduff with Macbeth's head.' OUCH! Yes, I certainly can't imagine anything more comforting than seeing someone's severed head on a spike. 'Here comes something to make us feel better guys. It's that bastard Macbeth's head on a spike!'

Well it's a pretty gruesome play with a lot of killing and description of killing in it, perhaps only exceeded by Titus Andronicus (you experts correct me if I'm wrong). So I guess this type of line is to be expected.

Just the same, and no matter how bad a guy Macbeth was--- would you be comforted by the sight of his severed head?

Commend these waters to those baby eyes

That never saw the giant world enraged;

-Louis

King John            Act V, scene ii    Line 56-57

Don’t cry. Or perhaps, don’t be a cry baby. That’s the shortened version of these two lines. Of course, would our favourite playwright ever say something so direct (well, maybe) and miss an opportunity to use words in such a way as to frame and enlighten and entertain and enrich? Probably not. What then is Will trying to tell us with this elongated version of ‘don’t cry?’ Well admittedly, we would need to have some context in order to know that. This is the second time we’ve hit King John in a week and interestingly enough, it’s the same character speaking that we had five days ago. I’ll give you just a little context here to see if that helps you draw some conclusions.

Louis, the son of the King of France, has enlisted several British noblemen to betray the British crown and come to fight for him against King John. One of these guys, the Earl of Salisbury, has just finished talking about what a sad day it is that he is going to be fighting against his own country; so sad that it’s making him cry. We know (if we’ve read/seen the play or if we’ve read some good notes) that Louis is a conniving bastard and the he plans to kill all the British noblemen who are helping him once he defeats King John, but that for now he needs these guys on his side. And this ‘don’t cry’ line is in the middle of a pep talk telling them all how they’ll all share in the prosperity once they’ve won the fight (which of course, they won’t).

Now, you tell me; what are the two lines telling you that you wouldn’t get out of a simple ‘don’t cry’. Is he taking a ‘don’t be a cry baby’ tone? Or is it something else? Go back and read the whole response of Louis. It’s less than thirty lines and with the background I just gave you, pretty easy to understand. Maybe even read Salisbury’s talk that Louis is responding to. That one is just over thirty lines. There, about sixty lines of Shakespeare. Do you think you can do it? Here’s the link

http://shakespeare.mit.edu/john/john.5.2.html

The first seven lines is Louis (in this online text it’s Lewis, in my hardcopy book it’s Louis) talking to the Brits about the pact they are making with him to go against John. Then it gets right into Salisbury’s regrets and Louis’s response to that. Louis spends a lot of time talking about the tears and praising Salisbury. He doesn't seem to be calling him a cry baby. He is honoring him (or maybe buttering him up); referring to the tears as ‘honourable dew,/ that silvery doth progress thy cheeks:’ It’s really beautiful imagery. An ‘effusion of such manly drops’. Almost hyperbole? Not sure. Spend some time with it and see what you come up with. Don't expect me to do all the work!